Midsummer Scream 2023
May 26, 2023
Coffin-Comb Tattoo Design
September 5, 2023
Stoicism:
Recently I have been asked by a lot of people what has changed in my life because I seem different, in really great ways. While I can explain this in person I was getting asked enough that I thought it was time to write it down publicly. Before I dive into things though I want to give you a little history of where these ideas came from. The last 3 years of my life have been some of, if not the most, trying years of my life. Undoubtedly they have been the longest continuous period of turmoil I ever have faced. Throughout most of this period I have worked through many of these issues with the help of my therapist. So while these last few years have been rough they have also provided me with the largest gains in my personal growth that I can remember. A large part of this personal growth, especially as an over thinker, has been to adapt the stoic philosophies of antiquity to modern life. Meditations by Marcus Aurelius has been my main inspiration for stoic philosophy but I have also read a few other resources as well. Since these philosophies are nearly 2000 years old they don't translate perfectly to modern life but I feel I have found that there are 8 key points I am working on adapting to my life.
1 - Accept what you cannot change.
A lot of things in life are simply beyond your control. You can free yourself from undue frustration and suffering by letting go of attempts to change those things.
2 - Focus only on that which you can control.
Your circle of influence can only extend so far. Focusing on things outside of your circle is a waste of time and energy. Put your energy only into the things you can control. Do nothing more than observe that beyond your circle. By observing these things you will be ready to react to them when it becomes appropriate. Your thoughts, actions and attitudes are always within my control and should be my primary focus.
3 - Cultivate a sense of purpose.
Stay motivated and focused with a meaningful purpose in life, especially when faced with setbacks or tough times. Stay proactive about continuing to push forward toward your goals, and when you accomplish them make new goals to drive yourself forward. Be the most active in areas of your life you can control.
4 - Be virtuous.
Live your life selflessly but in a way that is also good for you. If you do not care for yourself you are no help to others, but remember you are not more important than others. In all areas of your life you should act with purpose, intention and of your own accord. Follow these 4 core tenants in everything you do.
- Fortitude (Courage): A willingness to face discomfort, difficulty and pain head-on
- Temperance (Moderation): Avoid excess of all things. Too much of anything, good or bad, is not a healthy way to live
- Justice (Morality): Doing that which is right, especially when it's difficult, costly or uncomfortable.
- Wisdom (Prudence): Pursue truth, understanding and an open mind so that you can find insights into the true nature of things.
4 - Do not be ruled by toxic emotions.
Exercise your will so that toxic emotions will not have any control over you or be used to determine your actions. It is ok to feel these emotions, we are human after all, but you do not want to act or react from a place of toxicity.
- Anger: The consequences of anger are often so destructive they cannot be undone. It will often cause you more harm than that which you are angry about in the first place. Gentleness and civility are a more human response to upsetting circumstances
- Hope & Fear: Both of these emotions are the projection of our thoughts and beliefs into the future. Neither can change the outcome of the future but are guaranteed to add unnecessary frustration or stress.
5 - Diminish your ego.
It is unhealthy to believe that you are more important than others. Be more aware of the world around you, everyone’s life is just as complex as yours. No one is entitled to anything.
6 - Practice gratitude.
You should shift your focus from what you are lacking in life and put it instead on the good you already possess. In doing so your outlook will change from a negative to a positive one. This in turn will change how you see yourself and how others see you.
7)Negative experiences are learning opportunities.
Every challenge and setback is an opportunity to learn and grow. By reflecting on how a situation went wrong or how you could have reacted better you have an opportunity to learn. When you take these opportunities to grow as a person you will be better prepared for similar situations in the future. This also changes the view on a situation or outcome from a negative to a positive one and can be used as a driver for personal development.
8 - Lead by example.
Do not tell people how you live, show them. If asked, share your experiences or thoughts about what you were asked but do not preach your lifestyle. People will see how you live and follow your examples.
